A Baddap Christmas Tale
by NinjaGogeta
Summary: What's this! Baddap Sleed doesn't know what Christmas is? Well, Kanon's just gonna have to fix that, isn't he.


**A Christmas oneshot I randomly thought up. I though a Baddap Christmas special would be pretty funny**

"That doesn't go there!"

"Why the hell not?!"

"Because tinsel goes on the tree not on the fire place, the whole house could go on fire!"

"We didn't even have a fireplace till a few days ago, how should I know that?!"

"Isn't it obvious?!"

"About as obvious as your gender!"

"WHY YOU!"

Baadap watched his teammates roll on the floor, trying to gauge each other's eyes out with decorations. Turning around, he saw a green tree standing in the corner of the room, covered in red and gold balls. Turning back he spoke to the two on the floor.

"What are you two doing?" Callous and Eska jumped to their feet at their captains voice, Eska bleeding at the head and Callous's feminine hair was out of its ties. Eska glared at Callous.

"Girly pants here, has something against my decorating skills!" he growled out, sending the girly boy a death glare, one which was returned at full force.

"And this moron wants to kill us with a fiery death!"

"WHO ARE YOU CALLING MORON, LADY BOY!"

"WHO YOU CALLING LADY BOY DUMBASS!"

"SHE-MALE!"

"BASTARD!"

"TRANNIE!"

"DUMBASS!"

"FUTA-BITCH!"

With a roar, Callous leapt onto Eska, punching him repeatedly in the face. Baddap watched them a bit more before leaving the room all together. 'I don't even want to know anymore'

* * *

Baddap kicked the football at a nearby wall, sweatdropping as it crushed it, along with the house it was attached to. He quickly turned around and walked away, before bumping into someone.

"Ow! Sorry about tha- Oh hey Baddap!" Looking down, he groaned internally as he saw Endou Kanon sitting on the ground before him. The headband wearing boy jumped to his feet and grinned. "Merry Christmas!" he cheered, but he calmed down when he saw Baddap's blank face. The silver haired teen raised an eye brow.

"Merry what?" The look Kanon gave him looked like the kind of look you'd give someone if they told you your favourite anime would eventually have a talking blue bear in it that shoots people with guns that fusses people's auras together, and who drives a flying, time travelling caravan. Then, after they told you that, they tell you that the world was going to end because some really old dude's calendar was ending. Well, none of those things would ever happen, so it's hard to actually picture a look like that, but's that's the look he had.

"What do you mean 'Merry what'?!" he asked, aghast "Merry Christmas! You know, Christmas!" Baddap's expression didn't change "Xmas! The Yuletide season! The birthday of Jesus Christ!" Baddap's expression remained blank as ever.

"I have no idea what you are talking about." The tanned forward said. He began to walk away, but he was stopped as Kanon grabbed his arm.

"Not so fast! I'm going to tell you all about Christmas!" and so, the over excited boy dragged his once enemy to his house to explain to him the meaning of Christmas…..

Yeah that sounds weird.

Baddap sat on the Endou's living room sofa, watching Kanon set up a blackboard in the middle of the room. He graciously accepted a cup of tea from the boy's mother, and as he took a sip Kanon finished his preparations. Turning around with a grin, he procured a piece of chalk from….somewhere and began his lecture.

"Right!" he said "My name is Endou Kanon!" he said, writing his name on the board "Welcome to my class explaining the meaning of Christmas." Seeing Baddap's deadpan expression he chuckled sheepishly "Uh…right, anyway. Christmas is a once a year occasion that happens on the twenty fifth of December, which just as it happens is tomorrow. In the bible, it says that the son of God was born on this day, so at this time every year we celebrate his birth." Baddap raised a hand.

"Question." At Kanon's nod he continued "Why should I celebrate this holiday, I do not believe in God." Kanon grinned.

"Good question, I'm glad you asked!" turning back to the board, he drew a picture of a fat man with a beard. "This, is Santa Clause, also known as Father Christmas or Saint Nicholas, Good old Saint Nick etc. This is the reason you should celebrate Christmas! He brings presents to all the good boys and girls, and he gives the bad children coal." Baddap raised a brow, and a hand.

"Question." He said again, this time not waiting for Kanon to respond "Why should I believe in a man who apparently, from what I have gathered, gives out gifts to all the children around the world, in one night." Kanon glared.

"Because he's magical!" he shouted. Baddap sipped his tea.

"Or, parents purchase their children gifts, and tell them they came from a mythical being." Kanon stared, before breaking into tears.

"SHUT UP HE IS REAL!" and he ran upstairs, and the slamming of a door was heard. Not knowing how to respond, he just took another sip of his tea. Gearing a sigh, he turned around to see Kanon's mother standing behind him.

"I guess I'll have to deal with him." She turned to Baddap with a smile. "The meaning of Christmas isn't just about giving and receiving gifts. It's to show appreciation to those who mean a lot to you. Christmas brings everyone together, and it truly is a magical time of year." She smiled at Baddap's wide eyed expression "I hope that helped Baddap-kun." Baddap nodded slowly.

"Yes, I believe it has." He stood up, handing his cup to the woman before him "Thank for your hospitality Endou-san." With a bow, he left the house, and made his way to the shopping centre.

* * *

Baddap returned home late, to find the living room covered in Christmas decorations. Looking under the tree (he still didn't know why it was there) he saw boxes wrapped up in paper. Looking at the bag in his hand, he realized that they must be presents from the rest of the team, and came to the conclusion that it was some kind of Christmas tradition. Shrugging, he sat down at the table, and used the materials there to wrap the presents. Nodding to himself in approval he placed the presents under the tree and went to bed, ignoring the tufts of dark-teal hair on the floor. As he prepared to go to bed, he heard the jingle of bells and a jolly laugh. Rushing to the window, his mouth dropped open as he saw a shape flying of into the distance.

"HO HO HO! MERRY CHRISTMAS!" Baddap stared for a while longer, before going to his bed.

'I need to get some sleep.'


End file.
